Katharine Mary Rogers. She is named after Saint Katharine Mary Drexel. She is beautiful. She has a great sense of humor. She strives to do good. At the same time she can be mischievous. She loves her school and she adores her teacher and assistant teachers. She is making leaps and bounds everyday. She is our youngest child. She is the heart of our home.
Kate is with Down Syndrome and Autism and is non-verbal. Nothing stops her from communicating with me. I understand her needs. I feel her frustrations, happiness and love. I reflect on thinking before I gave birth to her that I could never be the mother of a special needs child. Only special people can handle a special needs child. When we were told that she is with Down Syndrome, I remember thinking, I would die for her. In a couple years after that when we were told she also is with Autism, I thought, she will have the best care we can give her. Never did I think, I can’t do this. I always thought that if God gave her to us, He more than knew what He was doing and I completely trust Him.
We went to Saturday evening Mass today. My daughter Ireland went to the back of the Church with Kate because she can’t sit quietly. After Holy Communion I like to pray for people, my country, my family, myself. I couldn’t concentrate knowing that Ireland would be holding Kate’s hand and going to Communion. I could hear Kate’s growl and grunts as they came nearer to the front of the Church. Father Tim heard her too and he stepped forward to give Ireland Holy Communion and bless Kate. It caught me off guard. It exposed my heart. I started to cry, secretly.
I have a mother’s heart. When I look at photos of my son when he was a boy and remember the things he used to say. Or my daughters and the many many many funny things they did and said. My heart just wants to burst. Then I look at my husband who made these children possible and never said we couldn’t have a big family. I look at him and I praise God for giving me this life. Sure, there are bad times or sad times, but mostly I praise God for those too, because out of hard times comes grace. Good always comes out of bad, always.
We are going to be celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary. It sure got off to a very rocky start around us. Our love survived. Statistics gave us a 5% chance that our marriage would survive because we had a baby first. Well, that baby is twenty-five now. There is a song that hits close to home, Kenny Chesney sings it titled “There Goes My Life” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xP-Sxfntdb4 Yes it is about a girl and we had a son. It is such a pro-life video. Two people thinking how can we do this and in the end saying how couldn’t we do this. Yes life isn’t perfect. We aren’t perfect. We are all sinners. Yet out of bad, comes good. Always. Now twenty five years later I reflect. We started out pregnant and scared. We always chose life! Then our last child possibly having special needs, we never knew for sure until she was born, but we were “warned”. She is the gift that keeps giving. All of our children have brought such joy to our lives. Every single one. Kate is the icing on the cake. So yes, life is hard sometimes and we get weary, then the light shines through and we know that everything is going to be great. It’s never failed yet. Out of Bad, Always Comes Good.